My name is gabriella. Henry md co lead life coach at doc, working and im here with my other co, lead coach, the wonderful jill farmer and today were going to talk about something that frankly, for some people is very, very natural. It comes very easily. They have that kind of social interaction bug thats already ingrained in them, but for other people it is the toughest thing and for me as well, you know how to network and how to make it count, and even the word networking brings up a lot of heebie Jeebies right there, its like, oh, my god, i have to go to this networking meeting, which i avoided like the plague for years. Simply because i just didnt know what to do or how to say it, how to approach people, and especially as an introvert. It was not something that came naturally to me and so jill. I know you have some tips along the line of how to make networking easy, and is it really the word to think of? Is there some other way to think about it other than oh? I have to go network yeah. I dont like networking either because i think weve all been to that creepy thing were networking with people handing each other business cards and then trying to sell us stuff right and so to me. Ive always been surprised right because ive worked through the years in different sectors, financial services and everything around the sun when it comes to corporate world and in healthcare.
It comes a lot with my physician clients to ask about networking as well, because theyre like i have to go to this networking event. We have to go meet with these and its not something that anybody ever told them that they were going to have to do, and so it feels like i have to it feels icky and it feels inauthentic, because physicians arent used to doing things to try to Schmooze or sell themselves or use to try to do authentic work. I dont, like the word networking i think of it as just relationship building and connecting its a way to either warm up existing relationships or to fill new relationships to look at the many benefits of creating new relationships and warming up relationships whatever that is new opportunities. New ways to collaborate, new ways to let other people know about what it is youre doing, which are all positives and so its not selling people stuff its, not impressing people its just connecting so im, not saying you have to love doing it im just saying if You give yourself a little preparation ahead of time. You may discover that you hate it less and that it can be more meaningful and effective if youre, an introvert youre, never going to love it and thats. Okay, just like, if youre an extrovert youre, never going to love. Probably you know two whole days of nothing to do except for be by yourself, but those are muscles we have to strengthen because we live in a world where sometimes we have to be alone, and sometimes we have to be with people.
So if youre an introvert, you do need to give yourself some time after you do any kind of a networking event to sort of refill your energy tank, because it is going to feel a little draining. Prep is the most important thing when it comes to networking. Just give yourself a little information about whos going to be there and what theyre going to be talking about and then also practice. I dont love elevator pitches. None of us do people are talking at us, but i do like this little formula that i use with clients that hate networking for having a easy way to talk about what it is. You do you can write this down and if youre driving you cant listen now you can come back and listen to it later and theyll take 30 seconds, but you just simply write down for yourself ahead of time. My job title is blank, which means i blank right, because, even though youre so used to whatever your discipline and field of work is a lot of other people in the world may not know exactly where that is or where youre doing it or who the patient Population youre serving is so you know my job title is time and stress management, coach and one of the lead coaches at dockworking.com, which means i work with people around time and stress management issues to help them be more successful, especially physicians right. It just was very easy, but if i just said im a coach and we left it there, you wouldnt know nearly as much about me.
Two more lines that i like to add to this little connecting intro are what i love about. It is, or if youre, having one of those periods of life where you dont love it. What i like about it is what i find interesting is and then, if you really want a bonus one – and i feel lucky too the way to put that together. So my job title is leadcoachadocworking.com, which means that i get to coach and help develop programs to support doctors all over the place. What i love about it is working with physicians, theyre, brilliant theyre, so intentional, and they are really coachable in my experience and i feel so lucky to help support them in doing the work they do in the world right. I wasnt selling anything, but you know a lot about what im doing just by having that little bit there gabriella somebody who doesnt love networking. Do you think that would help you if you had a little kind of ahead of time and intro in your mind about how you would talk about what it is? You do? Oh, my goodness, thank you so much jill, because i actually took notes and took down all the sentence stems simply because yeah that whole thing about that 30 second elevator pitch, which is something ive heard for years and been struggling with for a number of years too. Well, what is my pitch? How would i quote, unquote, sell myself or tell somebody in two sentences what im about and what im here to do for them.
I always felt that was very intimidating and i think, to this day i still havent found it and im still working on it. So i think this formula, so my job title is im a co lead coach at dockworking.com and as im, writing down im writing down ideas, which means that i love to catalyze personal professional changes in physicians to live the life that they want to live and what I love about. It is a lot, so i need to trim that down and im going to work on it, and i feel lucky to be here absolutely because its an absolute privilege to support colleagues in their movement forward and to live the life that they desire. Its very humbling experience actually and so im gon na fill in number three after we get off the podcast recording, but thank you so much. This is actually extremely helpful, and what i find just listening to you jill is that that pressure of trying to come up with something has completely deflated. It now feels more human, more relaxing and more fun to approach it. This way than to try to say whats, your 30 second elevator pitch and go, and i would also say, in terms of networking one, its a muscle that i get to build its, not something thats natural. I was not born with a networking manual thats for sure. So its a muscle i get to build, and i get to ask questions which i think is just a beautiful part of it.
Whether somebody needs to know who i am or what i do is important and at the same time i get to find out more about them and i get curious about their lives and their interest in what they envision for themselves and allowing people space. I think thats, a crucial part of networking is allowing people space like creating that trusting environment where they can start talking on a human terms, and we get to talk to each other on human terms is very, very valuable, as you said its not about selling its. Not about you know, leaving the meeting with a thousand business cards, which would be great, but it really is about speaking a little bit and listening more and asking just kind of general inquiry questions and getting curious about a person and their life. And people will remember that people remember as maya angelou says how you make them feel and to be of service would be the other last point, in other words, hey. I know someone who might be able to help you with this, so i may not be able to help you, but i know someone who does so. Let me put you in touch with that person and so making those kinds of connections as well becomes really really important, so youre there to make meaningful relationships. Meaningful connections not just directly one on one but for other people as well, and that way you are service and number three.
You get to be curious about other peoples lives and therefore you expand your own territory, thats. What i find im learning through as im getting a little better at networking over time and building that networking muscle is not about selling myself necessarily trying to get something out of someone. But to really say how can i help? How can i be of service and lets see what we can find out about each other? That has been helpful to me joe. What do you think when you just use that formula? I got goosebumps twice so i think thats a good sign that its really authentic and your authenticity about the fact that its really holy, who you are and what youre doing it comes through. So that was beautiful. Stay tuned for more after this message from empath iq, empath iq gives individual physicians and medical practices a way to control the online review process. Let empath iq show you how to get more reviews, tie them to your personal google, my business page and respond to reviews with confidence visit, empathiq.io, thats e m p, a t h, i q dot, i o or call 858 375 5686 youre a doc working fan And get two months free, you talked about the getting to ask questions to me. Thats, the second part, thats, really important. That can be tricky. I know for physicians, which is maintaining the conversation. Okay, i did the intro. How do i maintain the conversation, and i use this kind of silly formula called flow f, l o w and the first one is just friendly job curiosity.
So these are just questions in each of these categories for kind of keeping the conversation going again, you dont have to memorize them, but theyre just kind of things to have in your back pocket like how long have you been where you are and what brought you Whats your journey getting to where you are those are interesting questions where you get to hear about where they are now, but also what led to that again: youre not trying to dive into anybodys job stuff, but its just a nice warm place to start because were Already there talking, you know about what it is we do. The second letter in flow is l, which is low hanging fruit. So thats ask a question: if youre feeling, like the conversation, is stalling a bit, tell me about your relationship to this organization, wherever this networking event is whats, your connection to this charity. Anything like that thats, like were here together, lets talk about what brought us here together, thats low hanging fruit, the weather is low hanging its root, its a very simple way to warm a conversation, o f, l o is on life. This is my favorite part of asking questions and getting to know people. What do you like to do outside of work? Whats, the most interesting place, youve traveled? Are you interested in music sports? Do you have favorite restaurants or one of my favorite questions in the last year? What have you been watching on netflix? Those are just like on life, so youre getting to warm the relationship up and then the o is world events im not suggesting you talk about politics when youre just meeting somebody necessarily in an organization like this, but how did kovid affect your particular life and practice.
Just getting to kind of understand somebody elses perspective somebody elses take on something thats, a shared event: thats happening in the world at large in the community at large can be an interesting way, so those are just little things to think about. So you have a few questions in your pocket. Things are going to happen organically and when you ask somebody a question, if they dont ask you back, you can still answer it so that youre making connection, because maybe theyre a little awkward and they forget to say how about you. So when they answer your question and they stop, you can just go ahead and say and heres my journey in my career, yeah heres what i like to do outside of work. Finally, i call ending the conversation i like to say: quick and clean is how we go. I really enjoyed getting to know you and learn more about you and then you throw in a quick compliment about something you heard im. Definitely gon na check out that netflix show you mentioned. I think its really cool that you lived in three countries whatever. That is. I look forward to seeing you again soon. You can hand a business card if you want to you, dont have to and then heres the graceful dismount. This is the part that everybody has trouble with. That is simply you can say, im gon na go, get a fresh drink or some more food take care.
I look forward to seeing you again goodbye, or you can say that person i said i was going to connect you with youre, putting in top of mind ill, follow up with an email after this thats a great graceful, dismount or theres someone else. I need to greet so im going to go, say hi to them, thanks again for taking the time i really enjoyed talking to you. It avoids that awkward. When do we end this, we seem to have said everything we need to say to each other and it allows a nice finish up. So then you can move on and practice your warm connection intro with someone else and get to know. Somebody else so final thoughts on those structures for networking a final thoughts, one i vote for bridgeton as far as netflix series, total, crazy, romp, absolutely amazing and yeah. I think you sum it up beautifully in terms of one show up, and i would say not just show up physically but be present, be present to what theyre talking about what someone is saying, i think to me whats annoying in networking, if somebodys looking at the Door looking at their watch or looking at their cell phone or their attention is elsewhere or trying to send a text while im talking with them thats a bit of a turn off, so be mindful of those things. You want to pay attention and focus on the person whos in front of you and kind of block out everything else as much as possible.
Give them your full attention. People remember those things they do and confidence learning how to be confident in front of other people. Not to impress somebody but to be confident in who you are what you know, what you bring to the table, your skills and talents, your strengths, etc. Its not that youre going to give them a personal litany of everything youve accomplished, but it is to be able to be able to project that kind of enthusiasm and energy and pride in what you do and how you do it. People can sense that as well and desperation is a turn off. It truly is, so you want to make sure that if you need to do a little inventory before going in of your strengths, of what you bring to the table of what you think your skills are, you know what inspires you whats, encouraging to you, etc. Before going in just to have that in your mind and top of mind as youre talking to someone again its not to show off its simply to help build that muscle and build that self confidence as you move into perhaps unknown territory, if networking is new or Awkward or uncomfortable, i think your points about having an exit having an entrance having a strategy during and having an exit, i think, is perfect and theres so many ways to do that in a way that is encouraging and uplifting, and it ends in a high note For everyone concerned yeah excellent points and i think, just to encapsulate those together.
This is a muscle were building so number one tip to take away for today. This is a muscle. You build its not natural to you, its a buildable muscle, so dont be absolute im. Either a networker or im, not one of the ways that you strengthen, that muscle is prepping ahead of time, so that youre thinking about what you might say, whos going to be there. How you can show up with confidence and show up fully, as yourself were always at our best, when we can be as fully ourselves and staying focused on the person youre talking to instead of thinking about what are they thinking about me? Really listening really connecting authentically thats going to make it more naturally and comfortable for everybody else, all brilliant points, gabriella made tip number two use that intro formula we gave you my job title is blank, which means i blank what i love about. It is blank and i feel lucky to blank you can you know totally reformulate that in your own words, but its a nice starting template same thing with the flow of conversation, have a few questions in your pockets about friendly job curiosity, some low hanging through what Brings us all here together some ideas on life. What do you like to do outside of work, and maybe some larger world view that can talk about sort of what it is? You do every day fits into whats happening in the world and then, finally ending the conversation.
Our tip number three is make it quick and clean. Let yourself have a graceful dismount with just solid eye contact gratitude for the time youve spent together and then let them know that youre going to go on to greet somebody else on behalf of doc working lead, coach, gabriella, dennery, im jill farmer, thanks for joining us For this episode of doc, working the whole physician, podcast, Music, hello, and thank you for listening. This is amanda taran im the producer of the doc working podcast. If you enjoyed our podcast, please like and subscribe, we would also love it. If you checked out our website, which is docworking.com, and you can also find us on youtube facebook, twitter and on instagram on instagram, we are doc working one, and that is with the number one. When you check us out on social, please let us know what you would like to hear on the podcast. Your feedback really means a lot to us and, if youre, a physician with a story, youd like to tell please reach out to me at amanda dockworking.com, to apply to be on the podcast.